#auntie midge

[ask-shadowblaze]

Desserts - Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad Recipe This family recipe creates a salad that will please everyone by combining marshmallows with fruit cocktail cans, pineapple, and mandarin oranges.

[ghoulfilm]

Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad This family recipe creates a salad that will please everyone by combining marshmallows with fruit cocktail cans, pineapple, and mandarin oranges.

[allourlives-official]

Desserts - Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad

This family recipe mixes marshmallows with cans of fruit cocktail, pineapple, and mandarin oranges, all dressed in sour cream for a crowd-pleasing salad.

[glennnetwork]

Desserts - Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad

This family recipe mixes marshmallows with cans of fruit cocktail, pineapple, and mandarin oranges, all dressed in sour cream for a crowd-pleasing salad.

[hoedamn-eron]

baby, please - part 15

You join Santi at Frankie's Halloween party, and you think his friends are a hoot.

Warnings: Reader is called 'Auntie' by a four year old. Heavy on the Halloween theme (obviously). Bad descriptions of a decorated house (I've never been one to celebrate Halloween, I've never really decorated my house). Lots of dialogue. Like one swear word. Slight, teeny-tiny, self-consciousness regarding future relationships for the babies/Santi/the boys/other kids. Nervousness over meeting new people. Slightly drunk Santi. Word count: 4,301 F!Reader, no use of Y/N.

Again, not a great chapter, I apologise. I tried my best and no amount of rewriting could make me love it. But at least you've met the guys now!

Part 14 ● Series Masterlist ● Part 16

“I’m actually really excited for tonight, thanks for inviting me,” Gabrielle said as she walked into your apartment, kids in tow, already dressed in their costumes, the Hulk and…Michael Myers.

Theodore looked up at you as you closed your door, and he gave a loud roar, before ‘flexing’ his arms. “Hulk smash!”

You grinned before pretending to act shocked. “Please, Mr Hulk, don’t smash up my apartment! I’m moving out soon and need it to look nice for the new owners.”

“Are you leaving?” Theodore asked, lifting his mask, and looking at you with sad eyes.

You shake your head. “No, I’m just getting a bigger house, for me and my babies.” You pat your bump.

“Okay,” Theodore said, going quiet before asking, “Can I smash your new house then?”

“No smashing of other people’s property,” Gabrielle said, putting Luna down on the floor as the two-year-old toddled off into your living room.

You look at Gabrielle with an amused look at Theodore followed his sister. “So…Michael Myers?”

Gabrielle rolled her eyes as she made her way through your apartment, bags in hand. “I don’t know where she got it from, but she refused any other costume. I asked Matthew about it, but he’s claiming ignorance. It was definitely him though, but I’m not sure when he’s had the chance to watch Halloween with our two-year-old.”

You throw your hands up. “I mean…if Luna likes it – “

“Won’t people think I’m being a bad mother letting her dress up as a serial killer from a movie?”

“No-one’s going to think you’re a bad mother, Gabs. If anything, they’ll find it funny. I know Santi will.”

Gabrielle pulled a face before shaking her head. “It’s fine. You know what, it’ll be fine. I’m overthinking it.”

“You are a little. Seriously, don’t worry about it.” You look at her bags. “What are you dressing as?”

“A pirate,” Gabrielle replied. “And I made it myself with an old shirt and pants. They haven’t fit me since before I was pregnant with Luna so I thought they might as well have one last good use.”

You nod. “Cool. I’m going as Midge, you know, the - ”

“The Barbie doll?” Gabrielle cried, her eyes widening as she laughed. “That’s genius!”

“I have a wig and everything,” you laugh with her. “I hope it’s not too niche.”

“No, it’s great! I can’t wait to see it!”

You get ready together in your small bathroom as the kids watched cartoons and ate some dinner (Luna had refused to take off her mask until Gabrielle had bought out the PB&J sandwich and banana). Gabrielle looked amazing in her home-made costume (an old stripy black and white t-shirt, and some black pants that had been strategically cut to look ripped), complete with eyepatch and red head scarf. She helped you get into your costume until you both laughed with tears in your eyes, finding yourselves absolutely hilarious. You laughed even more when you placed on your red-haired wig.

“I need a photo!” Gabrielle said, still laughing, before you posed at the bathroom door as she took the picture, a wide smile on your face as you hold your bump.

After a few more laughs, and some photos with Gabrielle and the kids, you share the photos with the group chat, where Beth and Courtney both send back images of their own Halloween plans; Courtney at home with Andy, on the couch watching horror films with a big bowl of candy they were going to hand out to the trick or treaters, and Beth and Georgia at another Halloween party with Georgia’s family, where they were both dressed in a couple’s costume of She-Go and Kim Possible.

Once you and Gabrielle were ready, and the kids had finished their sandwiches, you text Santi to let him know you were on the way to Frankie’s house. He had sent over Frankie’s address earlier that day, and it wasn’t too far from the restaurant you had your date at. You set up your GPS as Gabrielle got the kids settled in the back of your car, settled in the car seats you had borrowed from Georgia via Beth.

“Are you nervous?” Gabrielle asked as she climbed into your car and closed the door.

“About what?” you ask, looking behind you as you backed out of your parking space.

“Me meeting Santi, or Santi meeting me,” Gabrielle answered.

“No, not at all,” you answer back, pulling out onto the street. “I’m more nervous about meeting his friends. He holds them in such high regard, I’m scared I’ll disappoint them.”

“You could never,” Gabrielle says. “You’re having the guys kids, I’m sure they’ll trust his judgement.”

You give her a look.

“Not that there’s anything to judge, you’re a wonderful person, I love you,” Gabrielle quickly adds, sending you a wide smile with a small giggle.

“Thanks, really appreciate it,” you snark back good-naturedly, shaking your head as you laugh.

“Auntie?” Theodore calls you from his place in the back.

“Yes, honey?” you ask him as you stop at some lights.

“When are your babies coming?”

“Not until February,” you reply. “We have to do Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year, and my birthday, then I’ll have my babies.”

“Can we meet them when they’re born?” Theodore asks.

“Not until they’re all settled at home,” Gabrielle said. “Remember when we bought Luna home, and it was just me, you, Luna, and daddy for a while?”

“Yup,” Theodore said.

“Well that’s because we all needed to get to know Luna first, wasn’t it?” Gabrielle asked. “So your Auntie and…her…friend…”

You smirk in amusement as Gabrielle tried to explain your relationship with Santi in a child friendly way. You make a right turn, making your way onto a residential street, already with a few trick or treaters.

“Anyway, your Auntie and her friend will be with the babies for a little bit before we get to see them.”

“Who is your friend, Auntie?” Theodore asked.

“His name is Santiago,” you reply. “You’ll meet him tonight.”

Theodore is quiet for a little bit before saying, “I thought mommies and daddies had to be married to have babies?”

“Who’s excited for the party?” you asked enthusiastically, causing Luna to cheer, Theodore soon joining, causing the four-year-old to soon forget his questions.

Gabrielle grinned before quietly whispering, “Nice save, you heathen.”

“I may be a heathen, but you will have to explain to your kids why I’m pregnant without being married. We’re here!” you call, pulling up to a nice-looking house, covered in Halloween decorations. The house was covered in fake cobwebs and ‘Keep Out!’ tape was stuck on the doors and windows.

There was a large, blow-up witch by the front door, and a few fake gravestones littering the front yard, some skeletons hanging over some, and you could see fake spiders with light up eyes scattered over the yard with them. The lighting inside the house was lightly fading into different colours, like purple, red, green, and orange. Lastly, you spot Jack-o’-Lanterns gathered together by the garage and the steps leading up the small porch, and the front door.

“This looks nice,” you say, looking at all the decorations.

Gabrielle nodded, smiling. “Looks like fun! Let’s go!”

You climb out of the car, giving a small shiver at the chill of the Autumn air, before getting Luna out as Gabrielle tended to Theodore. You hold the two years old’s hand as Gabrielle comes to your side, holding Theodore’s hand and the children’s bag over her shoulder. You all make your way up to the front door, before you stop, but you stand there, nervous. The sound of laughter, chatter, and faint music spills out from it, mingling with the rustle of fallen leaves.

You look at Gabrielle. “I feel really nervous. And really stupid because I feel really nervous.”

“It’s okay to feel nervous, and you’re not stupid,” Gabrielle said. “There’s a lot of things happening tonight, and if you’re not comfortable, we can just forget this and walk around the neighbourhood with the kids.”

You take a few deep breaths, trying to calm your rapidly beating heart. Gabrielle was right, there was a lot happening tonight. One of the most important people in your life is meeting an equally as important person. And in turn, you’ll be meeting the most important people in his life. You're grateful for Gabrielle’s comforting presence of your friend, her reassuring smile helping to ease the nervous tension.

Eventually you nod at Gabrielle before turning back to the door before ringing the doorbell.

After a few moments, your heart stops as the front door opens. You’re faced with a gorgeous woman, her thick, dark hair cascading in loose waves, sat under a witch’s hat. It framed her face, where her flawless sun-kissed skin was decorated with the glitter and Halloween make-up. She looks at you all with her dark eyes before gasping, her eyes widening in excitement. She calls your name.

“Yes, that’s me,” you say, smiling nervously. You assume this is Sarah. “And this is Gabrielle, my friend. And her kids, Theodore, and Luna.”

“I’m so glad you could make it! I’m Sarah. I’ve been so excited to meet you, can’t believe Santi kept you to himself for so long. Anyway, come in, come in,” she ushers you all in, closing the door behind you. “Your costumes look fantastic! Everyone’s just in the living room, I can put your bag in the closet?” she asks Gabrielle.

“Oh, no I’m fine, thank you, I can do it,” Gabrielle said.

“It’s no problem,” Sarah said, taking the bag from Gabrielle. “Go on through!”

You and Gabrielle thank her again before you make your way through the house. It was a small corridor that lead into an open plan living room, where it was just as heavily decorated as the outside. You feel your heart beating harder as nervousness ran through your body, as you take in the people in the living room. It was a little loud, but not too loud where it was obnoxious. The kids immediately let go of yours and Gabrielle’s hands at the sight of the toys scattered around the living room, throwing themselves on the floor and immediately playing.

Your eyes widen a little as you take in the small crowd. Santi wasn’t here. And you didn’t recognise anyone other than Frankie (who hadn’t actually put on a costume), and he was stood with a good-looking blonde man and a cute redheaded woman, who was hanging off of the man’s arm. The blonde and redhead were in a couple’s costume of Daphne and Fred from Scooby-Doo. Frankie chuckled at something the pirate said, before turning and catching your eye.

“Oh hey!” Frankie called as he saw you. He excuses himself from his group and makes his way over to you. “Glad you could make it.”

“Thanks again for the invite,” you say, giving a nervous laugh before turning to Gabrielle, who smiled at him. “This is my friend, Gabrielle, and her kids Theodore and Luna, who are absolutely demolishing your daughter’s toys.”

Frankie waved a nonchalant hand. “Don’t worry about it. Nice to meet you,” Frankie says, shaking Gabrielle’s hand.

“You too. And thanks again for letting me join you,” Gabrielle replied. “My kids love Halloween.”

“It’s not a problem,” Frankie says before turning to you. “Pope just ran out, he’ll be back in a few.”

You nod, letting out a breath you didn’t realise you were holding.

“Come over, make yourselves at home,” Frankie said, leading you both over to the people who he was talking to. “These are Will and Claire, I’m sure Pope’s mentioned them to you before.”

“Hi,” you say, Gabrielle giving a small wave.

“What can I get you to drink?” Frankie asked.

“Lemonade, please, if you have it,” Gabrielle said.

Frankie nodded before looking at you.

You really wanted Diet Coke, but you’d just met these people and you felt like it would be really rude to just…ask for something they might not have. Maybe you could just have a water? No, that was a bit boring, especially at a party, but you were pregnant, so it was the healthiest choice and no-one would question if you just wanted a water. God, you’re overthinking over a drink. You wouldn’t be so on edge if Santi was here, you wouldn’t be as worried to ask anything.

“A lemonade is fine for me too, thanks,” you reply.

Frankie nodded again before claiming he’d be back soon. He disappears through to the kitchen, not before stopping to give Sarah, now carrying a little girl dressed as a fairy (who was the image of Frankie), a quick peck before disappearing into the kitchen.

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” Will says gently. You got a chill vibe from him, although he looked rough and tumble. “Pope’s told us all about you.”

“All good things, I hope,” you say with a nervous smile as Frankie leaves towards the kitchen.

“Absolutely,” said Will, smiling as he pulled Claire into his side, her hand automatically resting on his chest, her engagement ring glinting in the Halloween themed lights. “You and the kids are all he talks about nowadays.”

You hold back a grin as Gabrielle gave you a small nudge.

“It’s been nice, that he wants to stick around,” you say, your cheeks warming. “Having kids wasn’t in my plans right now, and I could only guess they definitely weren’t in his.”

“They weren’t, but Pope’s always been good at adapting. And he’s really warmed up to the idea of being a dad,” Will said, giving a nod. “He’s dedicated to ‘em already.”

“Not dedicated enough to get a fucking car, though,” said Frankie, jokingly, suddenly coming up behind you with two glasses of cloudy lemonade in his hands.

“He said he’s working on it,” you said, coming to Santi’s defence, before taking a glass from Frankie and thanking him.

Gabrielle thanked Frankie for the other lemonade before looking between you all. “Is he fond of the truck?”

Frankie snorted, now nursing his own beer bottle. “He’d marry the truck if he could. He bought it when we came back from our first mission. Surprised it still runs.”

“Whose kid is Michael Myers?” a deep voice asked from behind you.

You turn to see a tall, blonde man, dressed – ironically – as a pirate. His eyes were the same colour at Will’s, and they looked similar, so you had to assume this was Benny. He was carrying a pack of beer in one arm, an open can in the other hand. He looks at everyone with a furrowed brow, confused about you and Gabrielle – obviously because you were unfamiliar.

“She’s mine,” Gabrielle said, rolling her eyes. “Don’t ask.”

“Holy shit, we match!” Benny cried, his grin widening as he motioned to their outfits. “Here I thought I was being clever being a pirate!”

Gabrielle gave a small, amused laugh. “Your costume is better than mine, I just threw this together.”

“Nah, you look great!” Benny said, and you could tell he meant it. He reminded you a little of a Golden Retriever; a dumb, loving, Golden Retriever.

“Well…thanks,” Gabrielle said, blushing a little as she took a sip of her lemonade.

Benny’s eyes landed on you, before smirking. “Been looking forward to meeting you.”

“Be nice,” Frankie said, giving Benny a pointed look.

“He bothering you, cariño?”

You turn so suddenly, you’re surprised you didn’t give yourself whiplash. Your breath catches. Santi's dressed as a charming vampire, complete with the fake-bloodied holes on his neck, a black cape and fake fangs that glint as he grins at you. As if they feel their father near (or, you know, the sudden acceleration of your heartbeat), you feel a few kicks from within, a reminder of the two lives quietly developing beneath the surface.

Realising you may have taken too long to answer, you shake your head. “No, no. He isn’t bothering me.”

Santi gives a small laugh of amusement before he holds up a case of Diet Coke cans. “Had to get these, since Frankie isn’t accommodating for new guests.”

“Hey, hermano, I would have gotten them if I’d known,” Frankie says, with mock offence, before giving Santi a pointed look. “Don’t blame me for your bad planning!”

Santi throws him the bird before pulling a can from the pack. “Might be a bit warm, I can put the rest in the fridge. Unless you want to wait?”

Oh, you love this man. You want to marry this man.

“I’ll finish my lemonade first, thank you,” you say, smiling softly. “I’ll have a Coke later.”

Santi nods before putting the can back in the pack before he glares at Benny. “Don’t be an ass.”

“I wasn’t!” he called as Santi walked off into the kitchen. He turned to look at you. “I wasn’t going to be an ass, I swear.”

“I believe you,” you say, nodding as you sip at your lemonade.

“Go and put your beer in the fridge,” said Will, laughing.

Benny rolled his eyes, muttering something you couldn’t quite hear, before he turned and followed Santi through to the kitchen, calling for him.

“So uh…that’s Santi?” Gabrielle asks you quietly.

You sigh lightly, giving her a look. “Yup.”

“Cute. Nice hair. And a nice smile…I assume, he’s got fangs in.”

“He does have a nice smile,” you say, before smirking. “Nice ass, too.”

You both snort a laugh in amusement before going quiet when Santi and Benny come back, talking animatedly about something that you couldn’t quite keep up with, beers in their hands. You avert your gaze, looking at Gabrielle, who smirked back at you as she sipped at her lemonade. You shake your head as Santi stands next to you, Benny next to him.

“What have I missed?” he asked, looking at the group.

“Introductions, mostly,” you say, motioning to Gabrielle. “This is Gabrielle. Gabs, this is Santi.”

Gabrielle and Santi shake hands. “Nice to meet you,” Gabrielle says.

“You too,” Santi says. He nods to Theodore and Luna, who were still sat playing with the toys. “I’m assuming Michael Myers and the Hulk are yours?”

“They are,” Gabrielle says, letting out a small laugh. “Theodore and Luna. She insisted on being Michael Myers.”

“Girl’s got taste, it’s my favourite horror film,” Benny said, laughing.

As the night goes on, more and more guests show up, and the house is soon full of people. Sarah’s brothers and sister had turned up with their kids, and Theodore and Luna soon integrated themselves with the other children, who ranged from aged 6 months old to 9 years old. Sofía had even joined after a while, although she played mostly on her own, beside Luna, who still had yet to take off her mask.

Sarah had set up some Halloween activities in the back yard; she’d set up a table with some pumpkins of various sizes and some carving sets, mostly for the older kids, but you and Gabrielle helped Theodore and Luna make their own pumpkins. Sarah had also set up a large box filled with water and apples for bobbing, something you opted out of, but howled with laughter when you watched the Miller brothers almost try to drown each other in order to win. Santi was by your side throughout.

You talked to so many people; mostly about work, how your pregnancy was going, if you were enjoying the party. You had to admit, you were having fun, and it was nice to see Santi interacting with his friends. He was…different. But in a good way. He seemed more laidback, chatted a little more, and you got to see him interact with Sofía. He loved that little girl. She was just learning to walk, and she would always find herself toddling over to Santi and reach up for him.

There was never a lull in conversation as he picked her up, it was almost as if it was instinctive for him. It made your heart swell.

The guys didn’t let you down in telling you embarrassing stories about Santi.

You started wondering what it would be like with your kids. Would he take them to Halloween parties like this? Would your children and Sofía grow up together and become friends? Would Frankie, Will, and Benny be as involved as they were with Sofía? You suppose it would be harder, with you and Santi not being an actual couple. They would only see the twins on whichever schedule you and Santi eventually decide between yourselves, and even then, that might not be every time Santi has them.

You look around the living room, holding your long empty Diet Coke can. Benny and Gabrielle were standing with the kids, talking about whatever they were talking about (something to do with boxing…you remember Benny had done some cage fighting), and Frankie and Sarah were putting Sofía to bed. Santi and Will were talking with Claire about wedding planning; but it did look like Claire was doing most of the talking. It was cute, you looked forward to hearing more about it.

You took the opportunity to sneak away to the kitchen, grabbing a moment of peace and quiet. You toss your empty can into the recycling before opening the fridge to grab another.

“You okay, corazón?”

You give a small smile as you look at Santi, who had joined you in the kitchen, beer bottle in his hand. His eyes were a little unfocused, and he was giving you a little dopey smile, probably from the few beers he’d had. You close the fridge. “Yeah, I’m okay. Just grabbing another drink. Thanks for getting these, by the way.”

Santi nodded, leaning against one of the counters. “Not a problem. It was my fault Frankie didn’t have any, I did forget to tell him.”

You shake your head at him. “I would have gone without, you didn’t need to go to the store.”

“Benny was going anyway,” Santi said. “And I wanted to. They didn’t have any Sourpatch Kids though, you might have to steal some from the Trick or Treat bowl.”

You shake your head, grinning. “I’ve already looked, they’re not the watermelon ones.”

“Damn, you just can’t get the staff nowadays,” Santi joked.

You laugh as you open the can. You hold it out to him in a silent offer, and he shakes his head at you, finishing the beer he had with him.

You nod, then you both go silent, and you take a sip of your drink. Something felt��weird. You couldn’t put your finger on it. It wasn’t an awkward feeling, not at all. But now, in this moment, there was an unfamiliar tension in the air. You’d been alone together plenty of times before. Maybe it was because you’d really integrated in each other’s lives; his apartment had a fully furnished nursery, which you picked yourselves, you were both meeting each other’s friends, and you even had your own designated snack drawer in his kitchen for your favourite foods whenever you found yourself at his place.

Maybe that was it. A lot had happened in the last few days and it was getting to you.

“You okay?”

You blink at his question before giving him a closed lipped smile and nodding. “Yeah. Just tired.”

“You can go home if you want, no-one will mind,” Santi said, coming off the counter.

“No, no, I’m okay. Gabs and the kids are having a good time.”

“You sure?” he asks, coming closer to you. “I don’t want you uncomfortable. You’re carrying my kids in there.”

You give a small snort of amusement before nodding. “Yeah…yeah, I’m sure.”

He doesn’t say anything, just takes a few more steps closer to you. Your breath hitches, as you stare at him. The sounds of the party in just the next room seem to fade away, and all you can hear is the thumping of your heartbeat in your ears.

The atmosphere is charged with anticipation as you and Santi share a moment of connection. He’s so close, you feel your back hit the fridge, your noses touching. He smells faintly of the beer he’s been drinking, but mostly of the pumpkins he helped carve for Sofía, and the cologne he always wears, and something that was just plain Santiago. It was mouth-watering. His eyes flash to your lips before meeting yours. Your lips inch closer, teasing the promise of a sweet, stolen kiss in his best friend’s kitchen.

“What are you doing?” you whisper.

There’s a pause before he whispers back. “I don’t know.”

You lean in, your lips barely meeting when the spell is abruptly broken as the kitchen door opens.

Santi jumps apart from you as you gasp at the sudden movement, and before you know it, he’s across the other side of the kitchen, throwing away his empty beer.

Gabrielle walks into the kitchen, looking between the two of you, obviously reading the room. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to interrupt.”

You open your mouth to reply but Santiago shakes his head, a light blush on his cheeks as he grins at her. “No, we were just talking. Nothing going on.”

You freeze. No, that’s not what he meant. Don’t overthink this. He’s a little drunk and you’re having his kids. It’s understandable that he might be feeling a little friendly.

You give a shaky smile to Gabrielle. “Yeah, just talking.”

Gabrielle nodded as Santi mumbled something about re-joining the party and leaving the kitchen. You both watch him leave before you shake your head, trying to calm your breathing and your heart.

“What was that?” Gabrielle whispered, her eyes wide at you.

You shook your head. “I…nothing. It was nothing.”

Tagged - @khonsulockley, @bluenredndeath, @superficialfeelings, @othersideoftheparadise, @beezusvreeland

[wonderlandleighleigh]

anything with lily!!!

At four, Lily looks quite a lot like Esther did, though Esther has their mother's blue eyes, while Lily's are her father's hazel, and one of Lenny's very favorite things is to watch the kids together.

It'd be easy, with the big age gap between Lily and her siblings, for the older kids to ignore her, but they never, ever do. Sure, Ethan (15 and making noises about dating), Kitty (14 and starting to get way too fucking smart) and Esther (eleven, and as outspoken as ever), have their their own things going. Baseball practice and the school paper and orchestra rehearsals, but when they're home, Lily is their favorite person.

On Sunday nights, they watch the Wonderful World of Disney together, and takeout, Ethan old enough to be in charge when Midge and Lenny have work. After dinner, they all sprawl out with their homework on the living room floor and play music while they work, and Lily plays with her dolls, pulling her siblings into the narrative every so often.

They've loosened up at family dinners, too, though Joel, Moishe and Abe are still not in favor of having all the kids sit with the grown-ups, but Lenny loves it. Especially because Lan is there, too, and the kids are all goofy and weird and snappy and clever.

"We should get a boat," Lan tells all of them. "Lenny and Ethan fishes and we can swim!"

"You're not swimming in the Hudson," Abe tells the seven-year-old. "We don't know what's in the Hudson."

"Probably a lot of people your grandparents didn't like very much," Ethan jokes.

Mei laughs, startled, while Joel narrows his eyes at his oldest son.

"You gotta?" he asks.

"It was a good joke," Ethan argues.

Joel rolls his eyes and turns to Midge. "You got anything to say to your son?"

"Oh, so when he makes wildly inappropriate jokes about mafia hits, it's my fault?" Midge asks.

Joel nods. "Yes."

Midge nods back. "Actually, that's fair. Ethan. Not at the dinner table. Save it for dessert."

"Sure, Ma."

"Real nice," Joel grumbles.

Lily giggles, though everyone knows she's too young to understand exactly what she's laughing at.

"Oh, is something funny?" Noah asks his little niece, reaching out to tickle her. "I'll give you something funny."

Lily giggles and squirms, and Astrid laughs, while Chaim (eight and too smart) reaches out to help with the tickling.

"Not too much, she'll throw up," Rose warns, looking mildly amused at the spectacle.

"Yes, let's not end the night with vomit," Midge agrees.

"This is why the children should eat in the kitchen," Abe grumbles.

"The kitchen in our apartment isn't big enough for all six kids to eat comfortably without one of them sitting on the counter," Lenny tells him. "And this is too much fun."

"Sure. Fun," Joel grumbles.

"Cheer up, Joely," Shirley tells her son, patting his hand. "These dinners aren't half as horrible as they were when you and Midge first separated."

"And nothing ever will be," Moishe agrees. "And it's...not so bad having all the kids around. God knows Esther holds her when in a debate."

Esther smiles proudly, and Lenny knows that she'll make a hell of a lawyer one of these days. He nudges her and grins with pride. "Lookit you, impressing the hardasses at the table."

Esther giggles and shoves at his face as he ruffles her hair.

Kitty beams happily and rests her head on Midge's shoulder. "I like eating with everybody. It feels nice."

Midge strokes her hair away from her face and kisses her temple. "Well I like having you all around the table."

"Where's Auntie Susie?" Lily asks, now perched on her uncle's knee and eating some of the leftover rice on his plate.

"Auntie Susie had to go to one of her client's gigs tonight," Midge explains. "But she said to eat an extra apple tart for her for dessert."

Lily's eyes go wide with excitement. "Two apple tarts?"

"Oh, she'll definitely throw up from two," Astrid chimes in.

"We'll split a second one, kiddo," Noah promises. "And then we'll look at the big plant book Papa Abe got you for Hanukkah."

"Flower book!" Lily squeaks happily.

"Midge, you gave birth to a nerd," Joel teases.

"The best nerd," Midge beams, glancing at Lenny.

He grins back and steals one of Esther's carrots, getting him whacked in the arm, making him and the rest of the able laugh.

[pacinosgf]

 once we played with dolls... (1/3)

now we play with dolls too, just in a different way! it's you, me, a computer and lots of words to use so we can play pretend as we please. my dolls weren't actual corpses or demons, but they planned to kill their husbands (when they had one) from time to time, and mostly they were princesses or rich girls who could do whatever they wanted. even then, sometimes i ran out of dolls to play and realized the need for some new distraction to keep things afloat and interesting, something we could call nowadays a non-playable character. mothers, sisters, husbands, affairs, the options are endless! so of course, i will use this opportunity to talk about some of my grown-up npcs.

josephine (usually called josie, though midge calls her posy to annoy here) is midge's sister. ten years older and a huge party girl in her days, josie was one of monterey's brightest stars, though born in the family less monterey-style possible. midge recalls watching her sister getting dressed to go out in some tight sweaters and short skirts or going through her extensive sylvia plath and virginia woolf collection and thinking wow, posy is truly the coolest girl ever. she loved taking midge for a stroll as an excuse to stay out of the house, and sometimes they'd spend whole afternoons playing at the beach or just having ice cream and chatting. josie is an antique deler and a true fashion girl, dressed glamurously even when there's no apparent need to, and never afraid of being overdressed!

the thing is, there's something about the bannion women... coming from a long lineage of german witches, any man who marries into the bannion family suffers from the unlucky fate of dying and making their wives, widows. josie avoided marrying her long-time boyfriend even after having children to make sure it wouldn't happen (though she claimed to be a non-believer!), but there was no way of avoiding the curse, and she eventually became the most recent widow of the family. she moved out of monterey after that but visits the family almost every other weekend, especially after becoming auntie to a little boy.

* the melmidge baby is the first boy birthed as a bannion in ages, so midge thinks he is free from the curse. or he is the curse itself. whatever that means!

@gllianowens

[nanshe-of-nina]

If anyone's interested, this is an English translation of one of the poems that got Kluyev arrested.

That was the White Sea canal of death Akimushka dug it, So did Prov from Vetliuga and Auntie Fiokla. Great Russia got soaked To the bones with the red shower And hid its tears from people, From others’ eyes in alien bogs [ . . . ] Russia! Better to be in smoke and soot Than the blood of canal locks and the lice of brushwood causeways From Ararat to the Northern seas.

The canal Kluyev was speaking of was the White Sea Baltic Canal. It was constructed between 1931 and 1933 using the labor of Gulag inmates. Working conditions were ridiculously hazardous and at least 12,000 inmates died during its construction.

While the project was completed ahead of schedule and under-budget, the canal itself was shoddily constructed and of limited use. To quote from historian, Donald Rayfield:

The canal had been built on Iagoda’s initiative by OGPU’s political prisoners, kulaks, and convicts. Even the engineers were prisoners. Iagoda prided himself on the speed and cheapness with which he built this canal—under two years, for a fifth of the budget—which showed Stalin what OGPU might do for the economy. The death toll was well above 100,000. Some 300,000 prisoners —underfed, freezing in winter, tormented by midges in summer— had cut through bogs and granite. There was little reinforcing iron for the concrete; human bones and tree branches were used. All for nothing. The canal was too shallow for ships that could withstand the Arctic Ocean; it was ice-free only for half the year and in any case the canal duplicated an all-weather railway to Murmansk and Arkhangelsk. Before it was finished it was crumbling and has since been reconstructed twice.

Iagoda saw the White Sea canal as a personal triumph. His brother-in-law Leopold Averbakh, with Semion Firin, deputy chief of the GULAG, and Gorky, led boats laden with Soviet intelligentsia. Averbakh, Firin, and Gorky contributed to a book glorifying OGPU’s humanity and expertise, and the re-education of criminals and subversives by labor. Among the writers who volunteered for, or were cajoled into, this act of prostitution were the “Soviet Count” Aleksei Tolstoy and the satirist Mikhail Zoshchenko. Prince Dmitri Sviatopolk-Mirsky, recently repatriated from England, and the innovative Victor Shklovsky were two literary critics on the flotilla of ships, and the graphic Hemingway style of the 600-page panegyric to slave labor betrays the latter’s hand. Imprisoned writers like the futurist Igor Terentiev were presented to the tourists as seekers of redemption by labor. Nobody on board could have been fooled. The statistics in The Stalin White Sea–Baltic Canal are lies: a figure of 100,000 laborers is given—the number at any one time and a third of those actually used. Fewer than 13,000 of the survivors were freed when the canal was finished.

[jasonburton]

Desserts - Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad

This family recipe mixes marshmallows with cans of fruit cocktail, pineapple, and mandarin oranges, all dressed in sour cream for a crowd-pleasing salad.

[multiversemaker169]

Tatsumi's family

Mom: Marina Gill

Dad: Enji Bushida

Siblings: Coral Bushida and Aiden Gill

Aunts

.Aunt Hannah(Enji's big sister)

.Aunt Penelope(Hannah's wife)

.Auntie Audrey(Marina's big sister)

.Aunt Tina(Steve's wife)

.Auntie Zoe(Kenneth's little sister)

.Aunt Lucy(William's wife)

.Aunt Clover(Collin's wife)

.Aunt Renée(Tina's big sister)

.Aunts Midge, Bella, and Jenny(Clover's sisters)

Uncles

.Uncle Steve(Marina's little brother)

.Uncle Kenneth's(Audrey's husband)

.Uncle Alex(Kenneth's little brother)

.Uncle William(Kenneth's big brother)

.Uncle Gavin(Zoe's husband)

.Uncle Collin(Penelope's twin brother)

.Uncles Rowen, Ryan, and Peter(Clover's brothers)

Cousins

.Judy Gator(Kenneth and Audrey's daughter)

.Dave Gill(Kenneth and Audrey's son)

.Justin Rhino(Steve and Tina's son)

.Mindy Gill(Steve and Tina's daughter)

.Stacy Bamboo(Hannah and Penelope's daughter)

.Emmett Roo(William and Lucy's first son)

.Simon Gator(William and Lucy's second son)

.Nora Gator(William and Lucy's daughter)

.Diane Tooth(Gavin and Zoe's daughter)

.Oakley Cottontail(Clover and Collin's son)

Grandparents

.Akane Bushida(Hannah and Enji's mom)

.Jacob Bushida(Hannah and Enji's dad)

.Tabitha Gill(Audrey, Marina, and Steve's mom)

.Filbert Gill(Audrey, Marina, and Steve's dad)

.Cassidy Gator(William, Kenneth, Zoe, and Alex's mom)

.Roger Gator(William, Kenneth, Zoe, and Alex's dad)

.Edna Roo(Lucy's mom)

.Spencer Roo(Lucy's dad)

.Megan Tooth(Gavin's mom)

.Terry Tooth(Gavin's dad)

.Lola Cottontail(Clover and her siblings' mom)

.Milo Cottontail(Clover and her siblings' dad)

.Betty Bamboo(Penelope and Collin's mom)

.Paul Bamboo(Penelope and Collin's dad)

(I'll add Clover's nephews and nieces later)

[shedrinkswine]

after packed suitcases, lots of did you pack your toothbrushes?, two cigarette breaks and with some recommendations, the kids were free to go with their fathers, off to whatever journey sol and robert had planned. bye, mommy, bye, auntie, and adele and poppy were left alone for what seemed to be the first time since forever. they were crazy about the little family they had built, of course, but everyone deserves a break, and it was time for them to have one.

she had scoffed at the boys’ suggestion to take the children on a trip at the start of summer break so they could relax a bit, sure that that had come from sol. i'm not even sure if robert knows the girls' allergies. but they were trying very hard to work on all that healthy relationship thing; refusing or saying anything would be petty, and adele was living for the moment she'd be free of the girls for some days. they were their parents' daughters, after all, stubborn and hard to deal with just like they were, and it was time for their father to deal with that a bit.

and of course, now she had some time alone with poppy, no worries of making breakfast or if the kids would wake up earlier than they'd like. as soon as the kids left, she made poppy get in the car so they could start their own summer schedule: make good use of their mayland vineyard pass and spend an afternoon enjoying good wine, sun and each other's company. not feeling strong enough to sober up, she had reduced her drinking to a glass of wine per occasion, one she savoured slowly and thoughtfully. she hadn't been drinking for weeks to be able fully enjoy their trip with no guilty conscience, replacing the usual glasses with cigarettes and sweets.

now adele puts one of her arms around poppy, eating a grape while they make their way around the property. she nods to chessy when they pass by her, enjoying their location. "you know, pops, i think that's a damn good way to start our summer. we should've called melanie and midge to come with us, just some mommies-not-being-mommies break."

[bagradbadalian]

Recipe for Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad This family recipe creates a salad that will please everyone by combining marshmallows with fruit cocktail cans, pineapple, and mandarin oranges. 1 package miniature marshmallows, 1 container sour cream, 1 can mandarin oranges drained thoroughly, 1 can pineapple chunks drained thoroughly, 1 can fruit cocktail drained thoroughly

[rafaelwoods]

Specialty Dessert - Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad This family recipe creates a salad that will please everyone by combining marshmallows with fruit cocktail cans, pineapple, and mandarin oranges.

[fearlesswriter]

Auntie Midge's Hawaiian Salad Recipe This family recipe creates a salad that will please everyone by combining marshmallows with fruit cocktail cans, pineapple, and mandarin oranges.

[ask-the-shorty-squad]

Aww, honey… you must be dehydrated! Do you need water or anything now that you’re up? You can tell your Auntie Midge anything you want!

— Midge

Um...

*Confused, he makes his way down stairs.*

Papa Teru! You're awake!

*Monaca rushes over to Teruteru and hugs him tightly.*

[eternal-star-rogue]

No I’m not free rn, I gotta some bullshit to get up to. I’ll tell you about it when it’s done and over with. It’s gonna blow everyone’s fucking minds but I can’t say anything about it cause I dunno how Dib is gonna take it if he finds out-

Oh fuck wait speaking of, Auntie Midge told you Dib is back right? You’re aware he’s in the hospital yeah?

UNCLE J I am going THRU IT right now. We gotta commit arson when I get home and go out for Aroma Joe’s.

Zipper? I haven't heard from you in ages. Of course we can, dear. I'll make sure to grab the good flamethrowers and well... I suppose you'll see when I get there. It's very arson-related. I have never been to Aroma Joe's nor have I been on Earth for quite a while. Are you free now?